As I approach my last weeks as a 27 year old, I find myself realizing that this was the year I found myself. Somehow this number has played a crazy role in my life so it’s only fitting I’ve had the experiences I’ve had this year. This year started with my “family” falling apart. I honestly didn’t know how to move forward. The first couple of weeks were rough. But then I did something I had never done in my life, I began to evaluate who I was and compared it to the person I wanted to be. I put myself out there in ways I had never done in my life. The hardest part was also going through a trial. The fear and anxiety I experienced during that week was beyond anything I could imagine. Luckily I had a whole support team behind me. But For once in the last 12-14 years I was alone, I was actually SINGLE. At first I wanted jump into a relationship but every night I sat there alone I realized the best thing I could do was to finally take care of myself. So I began to go out. I began to socially drink. I took random road trips, alone and with friends. I went to my first 21 and over gay club. I went to my first pride events. I met amazing people and reconnected with old friends. The most memorable probably being SD pride. I hadn’t laughed danced, or just been that happy for some time. Through my work I also met some amazing people. One of those being ♑️. She is so young but she helped me learn so much about myself. Whether it was through her horoscope findings, tarot readings or by simply being her. This year was the year I decided to finally say yes vs no( although some things are still a no 😉) I tried many new things. A lot of it was food, but if you know me, you know that’s very rare for me to do. I went to my first Horror Nights. I met someone that made it easy for me to love again. Someone that made it easy to just be myself. I’m not saying I want to date someone who thinks exactly as I do because then Id Be dating myself, but meeting someone who understood exactly how it was to feel the things I do was incredible. Someone that simply gave me hope because quite honestly I thought that would be difficult. But I think the best thing about this year was that I found it in myself to stop caring about other people’s feelings over my own. To stop sacrificing my happiness to make other people “happy.” To continue to give parts of myself that I never let myself have. This was the year I found my voice. Whether it was blogging, confronting people who hurt me, or getting back into my poetry. I learned that you can still be a family even if it’s not in the way you imagined. I choose to be the person I am, make no mistake in that. But I will continue to love people the only way I know how. I will keep doing things for people that will make them smile, without sacrificing who I am, without any strings attached. I stopped being hard on myself for making mistakes because had I not made any mistakes, I would have never learned the lessons and changed the behavior or my actions. I will continue on this path as I finish this year and start the new year. Taking every day as an opportunity to grow. But I will set boundaries and defend them with no hesitation. I am who I am and the people in my life will love me for it or walk out. Either way, I will be happy, because when you find the happiness within, nothing can stop you. No dream is too big or too small.
Welcome 